I’m Going to Get Arrested!!!

Ohnoz!!! It seems as thought I’ve gone and messed with the wrong Nigerian Scammer (don’t let the reference to being in the UK fool you – heh). I was just doing my thing and being a smart ass and now I have to spend my days wondering when the FBI is going to show up at my door and arrest me. Of all the dumb luck…

A Painfully Submissive Asshat

This asshat caught me in a bitchy mood. Perhaps I was unfair to assume he was just a wanker looking for an audience, but it sure seemed that way to me. Either way he should have left this conversation very early on but he’s apparently a glutton for punishment, so here it is. This chat [...]

Weirdest Random IM Ever

The opening line was intriguing by itself, but when I saw the profile pic, I knew I had to stop and chat a while.

With a Little Help from Led Zeppelin

This chat ended up being really funny to me. I let about five others go today but I was feeling mean when this one struck. And he helped thing by being a total ass. At the end, when he gets fed up, he switched his font to red, italicized and underlined. It was so funny to me, I screenshotted it as proof; you can see it here. lol — I hope you’re familiar with your Led Zeppelin lyrics as you read this one.

Tag-Teaming the Scammer

I had a bit of a good time with this particular scammer. Such a good time, in fact, that I allowed a friend of mine to chat with this guy as well. He was jealous that all the scammers contacted me and never him. I have his post with this guy/girl/whatever included as well – he’s good at it – I wish more scammers would contact him.

I Made his Protein Increase

I am fairly certain that had I not been too busy to really talk to this guy, he would have made it to my “scammers” list. As it stands though, I only got to live through his “butter them up with praise and flattery until you gain their trust” phase. The chat took place December 1, 2007.

Lying About Dying: ‘Rose Peters’ is a Stupid Bitch

I hate scammers. I really do. “Rose Peters” here is, unfortunately, lying.

It’s Time to Play “Who’s more Annoying?”

And the winner of the annoying battle is ME! Yay!

I am a nice person, really I am. But there is just something about random receiving random IMs that just annoys the hell out of me and turns me into a bitch. I decided this time around to make myself more painful to talk to than the other guy to see how long it would take him to leave. Turns out, not long at all. I win!

Like Too Friend Ship Real

I must have amazing powers. The ease and speed at which I can create meaningful relationships full of love and promise is astounMe. Take, for example, maqsood. He was unable to hide his budMe feelings. I am actually fairly certain that had I continued chatting with this idiot, he would have ended up in the “scammers” category instead of the “asshats” one.

Another Money-Making Opportunity Squandered

This one is pretty long. It’s another Nigerian money scammer. Do these guys actually have success sometimes?? It’s mind-boggling, really. IN the end, I passed this guy off to a friend of mine who kept him busy with ridiculous chats for another couple days. Unfortunately, I no longer have those logs. This is from December 2006.